He’s sleeping, and I’m breaking
The voice in my head returns to remind me that I want a cigarette for the 46th time in the last hour

What has become of me?
I toss and turn, beating myself for betraying certain aspects of me that I worked so hard to maintain for so long–
They were stripped away so carelessly and easily because I was vulnerable to the rush of rebellion

Sometimes when you love someone, you let yourself go
It’s never beautiful